An Ice Cold Christmas
by WALRUSvsUSA
Summary: Recently, Amu's older sister Ami has begun hitting her, hurting her. This merely added on to Amu's daily pain, as her mother and others at school bully her daily. What will she do this cold Christmas Eve, if nobody cares? (TRGGER WARNING: ABUSE, CUTTING, BULLYING, SUICIDE. Also, I am considering making this a two-shot. Let me know if you want more.)


I walked slowly along the sidewalk, my scarf bouncing as I walked past an old, wrinkly man selling large Christmas trees. He was grinning and waved at me, but thanks to the fact I knew him, I realized one thing; he was sobbing inside. His 'Soul Mate' had died on Christmas Eve a year ago, for she had gone out for a walk in a barren area and twisted her ankle to the point that she couldn't stand. Thus, she sat there freezing to death until he had gone out to save her. She didn't make it. I smiled softly back at him, before briskly walking away. I felt slightly guilty for being the one who will ruin his Christmas this year. At least I won't have to feel as guilty afterwards.

As I walked on the crowded, slick sidewalk, I felt the cold spike in one spot then another, before hearing the excited squeal of a child screaming "Snow!" before a soft, playful scolding from her mother. I would have laughed, if it was a different situation. How funny is it that the day me and my true love will disappear in this world, just happens to be a white Christmas, it's so funny, so sad, so beautiful. I slowly trudged in the snow, past the brightly lit stores and crowded environment, before finally reaching my destination. It was a cozy spot by the train tracks I had arranged the day before, so I could wait and see my death coming, with only me and the train knowing what I had done. My secret would stay with me only for a little while, but it was there.

I groaned as my bright blue flats scuffed the ground, surely leaving a scratch on the smooth leather. As I quickly walked towards the unusually busy train tracks, I heard a small noise. The sound was like a whisper, to which I then quickened my pace. While I continued my franticly calm walk, I pondered what exactly would happen to me. Would I suffer? Or would it be a quick pain? All in all, it would not matter. I smiled softly as I saw the bright red lights signaling that the railroads were there. I walked faster, a soft smile dancing its way to my face.

I briefly reconsidered my decision, but quickly shook away any doubts that I had. I was not going to become scared this year, like I had every year since I was at least six. This had to happen, it was the busiest night of the year and I was tired, so tired of waiting and wishing to meet the person who had the lock to my key. It was infuriating and exhausting to wait, although my friends and all others who have found their 'other half,' say the wait is entirely worth it. I had never met another in a situation like mine, which made me curious. Did they ever think the prize at the end of the tunnel was worth the darkness and occasional bugs were okay, and manageable? I did not.

I gasped, horror slowly squirming its way into my thoughts of what I was about to do. What about my friends? Or even my teenage sister? Actually, she had been dumped by her boyfriend (he was _not _her 'only one') and infuriated, she began taking her hatred and sorrow over the rejection out on me, just like our mother. So why would she miss me?

I sighed, quickly popping in my headphones to calm my nerves as I got closer and closer to the train tracks. My cheeks, fingers, and nose were flushed pink from the cold, and throbbed as I neared my end. I smiled. I reached the train tracks. I slowly crouched down on the ground, sitting Indian style as I waited for a train. I heard it before I saw it. The shrill but deep noise, growing louder as it came closer. I shut my eyes as my favorite song came on, soothing me to no ends as I waited. The sound quickly became near unbearable as the train's lights grew brighter and closer. I decided I wanted to see my end, and my eyes flickered open.

I was flying. Briefly, but I had gone in the air and come down again. As my body slid along the gravel, my eyes now pinched shut, I came to the realization; it's over. I no longer have to suffer incessant beatings and rude names. No longer will I cry and hurt alone in my room. My body slowly stopped skidding along the ground, with only a few twigs and rocks poking into my skin, I opened my eyes.

My long, red stained hair was strewn about, the scarlet and soft pink clashing against the snow.I smiled softly, relieved that I was not in severe pain, nor was I sad. My time had come and I could not change that. The only major regret I could possibly conjure at the moment was simple, so simple I was barely upset. My death means the sure death of another. Someone I've never met, but am already to marry.

My True Love.


End file.
